Monday, December 14, 2009

Shitty Weed

The last few weeks I have had some shitty ass weed. Everyone is hurting financially right now, including me, and I already have to stretch my stash and only smoke when I absolutely have to. Then the only weed I can procure is what they like to call "pretends". Cause it pretends to be dank. It looks like Dank. It feels like Dank. But it does not smell like Dank, nor does it smoke like Dank. It definitely doesn't have the little crystals like Dank. In fact it is more like Shwagg.

I am sick. It has taken me a very long time to admit that. I am not going to get well. There is no cure for what is wrong with me. So now it is up to me to learn to live with the pain. Out of everything that I have ever taken, Cannabis has been the best medicine. It is Cannabis that gives me, and my child, the best quality of life. It is Cannabis that has given me the ability to get out of bed in the morning. The ability to get into the shower. The ability to stand at the sink to brush my teeth. The ability to get breakfast on the table, and my kid off to school. The ability to wash dishes, and fold clothes, and vacuum even just one room. Not to mention picking up after the little slob I have as a room mate, or the dog, or the cat...

As I go through long lengths of time of having good quality medicine, anytime I need it, I tend to forget how difficult it is when that changes. When the herb is not as good, or the money just isn't there because the rent check is due, or my son needs new gloves.

I become slower. Waaaaaaay slower. I get less accomplished. Then it starts to pile up, and I get behind. The longer it takes to get more medicine , the harder and harder things become. Even dealing with the pressure of the water beating down on me in the shower is too much. I sleep more often, not by choice but by my body saying it's time to sleep and making me do so. I get irritable and frustrated as my normal routine is now hindered again by the pain. Then depression sets in. It affects my relationships; with my child, with my partner, with my family and friends. It affects total strangers, who come up to me and ask me if I'm feeling okay. (bless their hearts)

Then money comes in, and the bag is good, and after 3 hits I can run across the house, I can bend, I can jump, I can play with my child, I can love my man, and I can start again to do what needs to be done, and catch up on what's been piling up.

Now here is what the problem is. In states, like the one I am in, that do not have a medical marijuana law in effect, it is difficult to get a steady supply of Dank buds. You have to go to a dealer. He is sometimes out. So you go to other dealers. You have to take what they have because, unless you have a great dealer, there aren't really any choices. And when it's really good, people ass-rape the hell out of you. 1/8th of dank that would normally be $50, I have seen people try to sell for 60, 70, or even $80 if there was a drug bust recently. Sometimes you're too broke to even do $50, so all your left with is Shwagg, unless you have a really nice dealer who will nickle and dime. Or you get those people who pretend they are hooking you up, and really rip you off by giving you pretends at dank prices.

So my choices are, start taking narcotics again or deal with what is available.
I find this very unfair. I'll say it again. Medicine should be in the pharmacy WHERE IT BELONGS. If I can go to the Pain Clinic downtown and choose from hundreds of types of narcotics that will make me higher than the moon, then I should be able to have the choice to use a safer alternative.

What is even more unfair? The fact that our government continues to keep it as a Schedule 1 Drug when they KNOW it is has medical value. If they don't, then why do they continue to give it to the remaining FEDERAL Medical Marijuana Patients?

Montel Williams talks about them here.

Marijuana is medicine.

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